We named our daughter Sabina Amoreena Gelb. They were the absolute light of our lives. We had an idea of what they would be like even before they were born - and they lived up to all of our hopes and dreams.
Welcome to this tribute to Neta — a visionary artist whose life and work continue to inspire!
This site is so you can learn about Neta's life and explore their boundary-pushing artwork and music . As a proud member of the LGBTQ+ community, and especially within Trans and non-binary circles, Neta’s identity was central to their art and activism. Their fight for Trans rights, human rights, and freedom shines through in both their creative work and the way they lived their life — fully, bravely, and authentically. Neta was a great artist, unconfined by borders or constraints.
The sweetest, most curious, and well-behaved child you could ever imagine. Even then, their personality was rich and multi-layered, and they were always up for trying something new — from that irresistibly adorable and inquisitive little one...
...to a passionate teen devoted to creating music and art, and speaking out against injustice. Neta stood fiercely for what they believed in, especially in defense of marginalized communities — including LGBTQ+ and BIPOC people.
From a young age, Neta was drawn to helping others and became increasingly engaged in activism. Their journey led them to explore anarchism, punk and crust punk scenes, trans identity, and more — always pushing boundaries and questioning systems. At the heart of it, Neta seemed to be on a profound search: for meaning, for connection, and perhaps for a deeper understanding of themself and their place in the world.
This photo shows Neta — known as Seb at the time — speaking at a rally they organized near Central Park in New York City. They had hoped to attend a vigil for Leelah Alcorn, a transgender girl who died by suicide after being subjected to conversion therapy. When none was planned locally, Neta took action. We were so proud of our child and stood by them in full support.
"When you think about it, we are so lucky to have the things we have, and the life we have. Now people are starting to get focused on the environment. There's a lot we can do about that if we work together. Having a giving party makes you realize that there is a lot that you can do to help make the world a happier place."
On their 18th birthday Neta essentially left home, never to return for any length of time. They were going to leave about a week before that, immediately after their High School graduation, but I told them that they could not because they were under 18 and we wouldn’t allow it. Neta listened to us and delayed until they officially turned 18.
Their plan was to go train-hopping across the country with a friend who had experience in this. There was nothing we could say or do to dissuade them from this extremely dangerous plan. They said they felt that if they didn’t do it now they were afraid they might never do it.
The photos above are from the evening before they left, June 27, 2016, Seb’s 18th birthday. It was the saddest birthday celebration and it’s difficult to write this and look at these photos. We knew we were losing them, but we had no idea to what extent!
This was the most frantic, anxious and scared I’ve ever been in my life. We tried so, so many ways for months to get Seb to reconsider train-hopping, but there was nothing that could be done.
No Masters
No Gods
They never did train hop on that trip to the west coast, but they ended up traveling with people they’d just met, and we spent an incredibly anxious summer waiting for them to return so they could pack up for college, and head right back to the west coast. While they made it back in one piece, they never seemed the same again, not really.
But let’s rewind about ayear to 2015 which marked a turning point for Sabina — and, in many ways, for us as well. A few scrolls back in my Google Calendar take me to a time just before the mesmerizing face painting (which I thought was absolutely amazing — even if it scared me a bit); a budding musician entering their senior year at the Spence School - our 17-year-old who we loved deeply — full of promise, with the world at their fingertips.
April 2015, their first public performance.
My calendar tells me that on June 21, 2015 we took Sabina to JFK airport to spend a month studying at the California College of the Arts (CCA) pre-college arts program. While we were so very happy for them to have this experience, I recall a deep sadness that day which in some ways has never really left me.
Three weeks after returning from San Franciso, we three were on a plane to the west coast again - Olympia, WA - this time so that Sabina could participate in a one-week program at Queer Rock Camp (QRC), a music camp aimed at empowering queer, gender-variant, gender non-conforming, and allied youth through music and community building.
Neta returned from the summer of their dreams with a dramatically different look and asked us to call them Seb instead of their birth name Sabina, which of course we did. In some ways they seemed the same, yet in others radically different.
In their last year they told me they were now using He/Him pronouns, in addition to Them/They. This scared me and regrettably I clung to the more comfortable (for me) Them/They.
I’ll always remember them as a fierce and brave artist. I still share their work each year to current AP students...who would not have the freedom they have without Neta having kicked down the door of claiming one's own identity.
Perfroming at Long Lake Camp for the Arts (left) and in Union Square Park (right)
On Sabina's 15th birthday Angela & I took them to see Courtney Love at the Capital Theater, Port Chester, NY. After the show Courtney noticed Neta's homemade Courtney Love t-shirt. How I wish I had that shirt today!!! This was such a highlight for Neta and I was so happy for them.
We loved Neta more than they knew or could ever know, from the first day to the last, and we’ll love them forever.
When I think of them in their more recent years, they are Neta. They shared their new name with us around 2020 or 2021, explaining that it means “seedling” in Hebrew. They seemed hopeful during this time, and it felt as if the name was a quiet foreshadowing — a sign of growth, of rebirth.
A lover of Asian culture at a very young age - we never knew why; to an inquisitive, funny and simply lovely young teenager (albeit not always like when they sometimes ducked in the car when we drove through town so they wouldn’t been seen with their parents - though of course we found this adorable as well);
When I picture Neta as a little child, they are our daughter named Sabina, who we often called Bina. In what I’ve now come to think of as the middle years, or perhaps the High School years, I think of them as Seb.
Seb transitioned — radically so in my mind, though perhaps not in theirs — from a kid focused on getting into a top private school to a bold thinker and activist. When I think of Seb entering the Spence School, I think of Bob Dylan in the final stretch of his acoustic years — you could feel him straining to shed his skin, ready to explode into a new persona and a new direction.
I felt something similar with Sabina — a readiness to break free and show a new outward self to the world. But looking back, I realize how little we truly knew about what they were feeling and living through. Does anyone ever really know the full reality of another human being, no matter how close we think we are?
When I think of them in their more recent years, they are Neta
They shared their new name with us around 2020 or 2021, explaining that it means “seedling” in Hebrew
They seemed hopeful during this time, and it felt as if the name was a quiet foreshadowing — a sign of growth, of rebirth
Changing their name to Neta seemed very positive — it carried such a sense of hope. In their last couple of years, they were striving to create and to find new purpose. We received countless texts filled with photos of their latest creations that they had baked, knitted, or sewn.
Neta always seemed to be striving for something
Something meaningful and connected to community
They always focused on trying to help others and we were incredibly proud of them.
I gravitated toward Neta because of their brilliant self-expression, fierce passion for their beliefs, and hilarious personality. I have a great memory of Neta doing my makeup one day in the common space at Spence. I wore that makeup so proudly all around Spence, and on my whole walk home.
Neta was a beautiful and bright light in this world, and will be dearly missed by everyone they touched. Thank you Neta for always speaking so fearlessly to protect what you loved, for being so proud to be yourself, and for being my friend. I will miss you forever.
We were blessed to spend 2 weeks with Neta in December 2021 around the holidays and for Gary's 60th birthday.
Neta made an unforgettable birthday feast. There was a scallop dish, borscht and freaking Chirashi, along with birthday cake that had crushed hazelnuts and pistachios. In the morning they served homemade challah bread in a Seinfeld-themed challah cover. Everything was based on what they knew to be my favorites &/or our Jewish heritage. Neta's artistry comes through in everything they touched. Words can't express how joyful I feel looking back, seeing Neta with their cousins and watching Neta help Angela trim the Christmas tree. And msot of all just getting to spend time together.
We were so very happy to have them home at this time and we'll cherish the time we had together. Little did we know that just 10 months later they’d be gone.
The shock of losing your child, your only child, is indescribable.
We loved Neta more than they knew or could ever know from the first day to the last and we’ll love them forever.
Bringing together the art they created, as well as attempt to radiate who they were, are, and always will be to us and their friends and family, gives us great comfort and joy.
We were blessed to have had this extraordinary soul in our lives. We hope this website honors Neta’s spirit and offers you a way to remember them — or to meet them for the first time.
With love,
Neta’s family
Any questions or remarks? Just send a message!
